Incision

I’ll be honest, I’m nervous about what happens when the wound-vac comes out. I mean, don’t get me wrong… I can’t WAIT for it to come out. I can’t wait to turn in bed at night without having to wake up and make sure I don’t lie on or kink the tubing. I can’t wait to be unfettered. I can’t wait for the silence of not having the stupid machine constantly clicking and chugging.

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And let’s face it… it’s the best thing that could have happened after surgery. Not that I was particularly thrilled with having an abscess and an infection and waking up at 4:30am in the hospital to one of my staples popping… it was gross and kind of traumatizing… but the wound-vac has sped up the healing process so so much it’s honestly kind of amazing.

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But pretty soon (like… possibly as early as tomorrow… or Wednesday), the wound is going to finally be too shallow to continue using the wound-vac. But to me… it still looks so deep and so severe. They keep saying that they’ll go to wound-care and bandaging at that point, but jesus even though it’ll be shallower…. there’s still a fucking hole in my stomach. I mean I practically have a second belly button.

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I am honestly scared of finishing the healing process without the wound-vac. I just have no idea what to expect. :sigh: Of course part of that is probably just that I can’t picture my stomach without the incision now. It’s so much a part of my life now you know?

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I don’t know. There are so many bigger and more stressful problems right now, and even more headed my way… but this is what I worry about right now.