After

Home. Well at Mom’s anyway still.

Frustrated by how slow the healing process is. They were able to do almost everything hysteroscopically, but there was a mass that was too large so they had to make an incision above my belly button that is now stapled shut. It’s painful, and stiff, and I am incredibly frustrated and impatient with how long it’s taking to feel better.

Have been dealing with a TON of anxiety.

I am scared of what happens when I need to have a BM.

A lot of my anxiety is coming from stuff like that. Had to have nurses help wipe me in the hospital and was really really surprised and disappointed taht they didn’t wait until I felt more mobile to send me home. I’m embarrassed and frustrated and …. afraid of my body right now. And it sucks.

And I know everything went well, people keep telling me that, my Dr. was really really pleased with the surgery, and with my post-op progress… but I am so terrified all the time, and so incredibly self-conscious.

I still haven’t returned anyone’s phone calls or texts. I just can’t. I can’t handle people right now. They have me on anti-anxiety pills thank god… but it’s still pretty bad. I didn’t expect it to be like this. I don’t know what I did expect… but it wasn’t this and I’m really struggling a lot. I know, logically it’s going to get better. I’m just not really feeling it right this second. :sigh: